"You’d be perfect for our board of directors.  We could really use your [insert your expertise here] skill at [insert local non-profit here].

You’re smart.  You’re busy.  You’re successful.

Of course everyone wants to you to serve on their board of directors, or fundraising committee, or homeowners association.

And for folks with attention deficit disorder, nothing quite sparks our excitement like a new opportunity.  And for folks with attention deficit disorder, nothing quite takes the edge off like saying "yes" when someone asks for it.

If you’ve read this far, you know that saying "yes" isn’t always the best idea.  And saying "no" so often hurts.  But on the days when you do say "no," consider all the good.  They asked because you are smart, and you are busy and you are (quite possibly) successful.  That’s something worth smiling about.  And if you really are smart and if you want to stay successful, you know you’re going to say "no" pretty darned often.  So put those "no" moments in your "win" column — they’re something to smile about.  And don’t forget to say "thank you" to the folks who wanted you, for recognizing you as the sharp person that you are.

Just for Today: see if you can give five unique and sincere expressions of praise to the people you work with.

Write them down.  Count them.  Make sure you get to 5.

Sincere praise is a gift.  It’s the gift of noticing something good.  It’s the gift of letting someone know that you noticed.  And it’s the gift of taking the time to tell them, with at least some unique detail, just what you saw and why you liked it.  It isn’t just "Nice presentation, Jim," as you rush out the door to your next meeting.  But maybe "Nice presentation, Jim.  I appreciate how you helped us get clear on the risk/opportunity options for changing production line B.  I’m glad you didn’t gloss over that part before addressing the rest of the agenda."

This attention to detail is extra important for the ADDexec who can often appear distracted in the eyes of their staff and colleagues.  I once heard a businessman say about another, "Pete is so ADD — I don’t think he’s heard a word I’ve said in the last ten years."  When you give good praise, you’re not only doing something right — you might be helping yourself out of a hole you didn’t even know you’d dug.

And one last thing about giving sincere praise to your "subordinates."  Done right, it lets them know that you know you need them.   That message of intelligent humility is a communication worth having.

“Sure I am a religious man who is also passionate about conserving the environment. But I am also a CEO, with all the bad habits and attitudes that are natural to the species.. . . I am still naturally self-interested, overconfident, full of pride, and eager to control a meeting as any CEO in America. Every day, I struggle with my ego.”

— Tom Chappell in Managing Upside Down

Chappell understands that anyone with the strength to be a successful CEO is not likely to be a perfect, considerate, or quiet soul 24/7. But this doesn’t mean he’s given up on character. Instead, it means he knows he’s got a wrestling match, every day.

Those of us with attention deficit disorder and a C-level job can share some of his attitude. We’re not always easy to work with, and we can apologize for where our nature hinders progress or makes life harder for others. But at the same time, we can embrace the fact that our nature is also part of what makes us motivated and strong.

About Tom Chappell, in case you didn’t already know: In the 1970s, Chappell co-founded Tom’s of Maine, which has grown into one of the most enduring success stories of business done right. Last year, Chappell sold Tom’s of Maine for $100 million to Colgate-Palmolive. Fifteen years ago, Chappell endowed a professorship at the Harvard Divinity School, where he had just completed his Masters degree in Theology. Clearly, Chappell knows something about the spirit as well as the marketplace. Chappell is author of several books, including The Soul of a Business: Managing for Profit and the Common Good and Managing Upside Down: Seven Intentions for Values-Centered Leadership.